we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
Apparently it's ok to apply for building permits drunk. I feel like there definitely is a law preventing that.
He came when Ron Burgundy started playing the jazz flute. How do you think it went?
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game.
I don't want to ruin date night, but you have no idea how hard it is to poop whilst looking at cute puppies.
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.
Campus is too small for this to keep happening
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
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