i hope push ups and a ton of orange juice gets rid of chlamydia
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
doctor said mango vodka does not count as my daily servings of fruit. damn.
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
Our house rule in beer pong, is that if you get the ball in the bitch cup.... you have to snapchat your balls to everyone on your friends list.
I licked your asshole in confidence.
You're so sweet in the most vulgar ways
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
Randomize
