Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
I came home and my mom goes "why are you barefoot and where the hell are your shoes?" and I replied "I have French fries"
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...
i solemnly vow to never stick my penis into crazy again
I give it a week.
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
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