just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
If the Four Horseman of the Apocalypse gang banged each other and had a kid, it would look like the creature I woke up next to this morning.
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
So the same day I accidentally bought waterproof mascara is the day I accidentally had shower sex. The world is finally on my side.
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
Lost my virginity dressed as catwoman. He was dressed as batman. Glad I waited.
I heard you were drinking whiskey straight from the bottle last night.
Actually I was drinking whiskey straight from 3 bottles, but that is neither here nor there.
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
You need a sexual gate keeper
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
Randomize
