Well apparently he's into motor boating.
Being this Hungover on Easter has brought my closer to Jesus... I swear he had to feel shitty like this after coming back from the dead
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
Judging by my dry clothes and wet sheets, I think I might have gotten out of bed, pissed ON it, covered it up, and passed out on top of it
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
He pissed on a police station. Then expected to not be arrested. Sounds accurate.
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
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