I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
You've picked up chicks by quoting metal bands
When they're drunk they believe it's Shakespeare...enjoy the simple things
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
As I sit on the toilet at 4 am I realize tonight could have gone a lot better
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
My mom just called me to tell me that i dont have chlamydia. Awkward.
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
Is Oprah even human
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
Randomize
