i just ordered an al pacino with double mocha at starbucks.. i'm waiting to see how long it takes the chick to realize what i said.
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
i got totally wasted at 2pm and cleaned the house bc i was bored. my mom now supports my alcohol problem
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
I just dropped a paperclip into my cleavage while talking to the company president... That's an awkward moment.
Did you at least offer to let him get it out??
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
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