ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
Your either lost or getting food, if your lost find me a girl on your way back, if your getting food grab me a double cheese
Brown or brunette? Ketchup or mustard?
I love you bro
OH FOR FUCKS SAKE! SOMEONE TOOK ME FOR A GODDAMN PROSTITUTE!! IM WEARING LEG WARMERS!!! THAT IS LIKE THE LEAST HOOKERISH THING TO WEAR!
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
I am lonely and hungry. I need a girlfriend, but I'd settle for my mom.
If you bring home Chipotle tonight I'll give you an epic bj...ball play and all #datenight
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
You were lost on foot. Texted us and told us that N*Sync couldn't save you, and then you "met Jesus" in your car.
Randomize
