Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
Sudden realization: I dumped him because he was too immature, yet I am the one who moved back into my parent's basement post-breakup.
oh my god. were standing in the kitchen and were chanting "EYEBROWS" and shaving peoples eyebrows. I have work tomorrow and want to keep my eyebrows.
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
That moment when you notice a tiny IR camera pointing at you, in your bed, at the apartment you found on Craigslist.
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
Here's a tip: do NOT chant "MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS." during sex because the Packers won against the Giants.
You spilt a drink on my couch, then used my dog to mop it up... you called her a mop dog, repeatedly
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
Our livers get a hall pass for 2020, right?
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