she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
I'm trying this new thing, it's called standards
we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
how come everytime i call mom shes doing tequila shots
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
Like real life can suck my metaphorical dick right now.
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
Randomize
