If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
Your message has been received by an unknown user. Picture verification required.
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
Snaps to my Ella Fitzgerald station for such a jazzy walk of shame
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
I mean, he’s listed as “Andrew DC Threesome” in my phone. THATS HOW I REMEMBER HIM! How is that not the start of a fairytale?
Randomize