I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
so I was like, you know platform 9 3/4? I know something else with those measurements. best. pick up line. ever.
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
This Xanax laced vodka tonic will help me forget that all these spring breakers are all young enough to have been my students.
We realized he wasn't with us anymore, so we turn around and he's 20 feet back, peeing on a squirrel.
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
Your shirt... Was in my pants
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
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