this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
THEYRE FUCKING GOLD
Are you talking about the color of my tits or the quality of my nudes cause both are
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
Just woke up in a Price Chopper bathroom stall with a half eaten cake on the floor. Had to get a ride from the waitress I made out with. What happened to "Don't let me drink Tequila?"
I lied.
bonus check + party bus = big hot mess
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far I’m loving being divorced. :-)
Randomize
