Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
I wish I had a waterproof laptop so that I would watch porn in the shower.
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
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