I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
I just got off a plane from Mexico. At least 15 passengers dashed to the bathroom throughout the flight. Can you tell its spring break?
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
Guess who just rode home in a cop car?! Your Fav flamingo
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
My night started to turn around the time I started calling her a "raggedy cunt".
Somehow she got that I meant it as a term of endearment.
Get here now. I need a drinking buddy. I don't care if you're in a different timezone, it'll be five o clock here faster.
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
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