normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
An accidental pregnancy to a guy with a trustfund is no mistake. It is a gift from god.
I am literally using a balloon as a pillow on a park bench.
I pulled my bra outta my purse. Covered in honey mustard. I still lack an explanation.
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
When she said "Tighten your safety belt and hold on!", that should have been a clear sign to me that one should never go off-roading in a rental car. On the bright side, they were able to tow her car out the next morning.
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
I forgot to tell you, that tinder guy literally lives 15 floors beneath me. I have been creepily saying things to him like "I see youve got a hammer on the patio"
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
I had a dream that we had an entire sofa made out of cocaine.
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
Randomize
