I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
Mike and I just ate the lobster we found in the toilet
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
She told me that for every Ravens touchdown, I'd get to come once.
Marry her. Marry her now. I'll help you steal the ring.
My girl came home. i was jacking off on the couch and she just starts telling me about her day, as if im not half naked with my hand on my cock.
You know how I know she's ugly? 97% of her profile pics are flowers or animals. And what do we know about pretty people and the Internet?
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
They just canceled the season. It’s going to be harder to bang soccer moms this year
Randomize
