her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
The stripper told me she had been working there for eight years, then got mad when I asked if she was trying to make it into mangment. Awkwardest lap dance
Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup.
Woke up with a chicken parm sandwich in my clutch. Aaaand I'm eating it.
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
i ate a whole tub of butter with my hands last night. don't tell me about rock bottom
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
I could run a drunk marathon in heels
If I had a mugshot, I would totally use it as my main picture on Tinder, just to keep it interesting.
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
I have unfollowed so many people the only things showing up in my newsfeed are dog rescues and sloth memes
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