Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
I'm calling into work with a wicked case of sledge hammer crotch. She has to understand
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
Note to self: last nights makeup does NOT, under ANY circumstances, look good today.
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.. I just figured you were drunk and needed somewhere to crash, but your no where to be found. I'll I have is this corn dog. call me when you get this. I'm worried! --mom
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
What if for Halloween I paint my self gold and make sandwiches for everyone? I'd be a trophy wife! Get it?
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
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