Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
I wish I could rewind to my 8th birthday instead. I wanna wake up, eat as much cake as I want, and have a Transformers birthday party without someone judging me.
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
You walked in, sat down, looked at the waiter and said, "I'm only having deserts and liquor."
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
Mom got drunk as hell, crashed Dad's wedding and some how left with the best man. This is why you should be glad you aren't my sibling.
Randomize
