We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
I just had sex in the back of an ambulance. Call me.
She rode me to the beat of Baby Got Back. I swear to god.
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
you told his mom that the only thing he wants for christmas is his dick in your mouth
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
Look at you go. You're like the Slutty Librarian that Could. They should write children's books about you. Children's books for adults.
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
bonus check + party bus = big hot mess
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
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