Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
i wish starbucks made bloody marys
You know, it's scary to think that someday I might buy a pregnancy test with pride, not at 2am...
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
I have bruises covered in glitter and someone just asked me if I realized I'm bleeding from both ears. This is awkward.
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
You dropped my mother on the dance floor. She has a concussion. You didn't apologize. Don't speak to me for a while.
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
I am now "wine pairing" tums flavors with my strongbow, because apparently hard cider gives me heartburn.
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
Randomize
