Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
its raining. im dressed as yoda and im trick or treating alone. and i wonder why im still a virgin..
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
I have shoes on. No pants. And my jacket pockets are full of ketchup and grass. Yes. Good night.
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
My grandpa just complimented my boobs. Im taking this as a compliment but also brushing it off as alcoholism on his part.
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
I'm at my friends house alone, she's at spin class so I'm wearing her engagement ring and eating buffalo wings. It's 9:30am. Happy Valentine's Day.
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
So you realized he wasn't actually cheating on you and now you're trying to unfuck things. Or in this case unfuck Tom.
Randomize
