so he reminded me it was our 9 month anniversary and then said "we could've had a baby by now"
You're the 8th person from last night to text me this morning and ask if I'm ok.
i woke up surrounded by junior mints. not to mention, there was a huge pyramid of natty cans baracading the door shut. this is why i can't drink alone.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
Oh, and thanks to you. I'm now stuck in the living room, held hostage, listening to my roommate's "How I discovered I was bi" story. FUCK YOU.
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
You can't just leave with hair like that
My mom is currently out with her lesbian friends and I'm home alone drunk listening to the Les Miserables soundtrack. WHY DO I FEEL THE NEED TO COMPETE WITH HER?
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
you pulled out seven eyelashes and made me count them multiple times whilst crying hysterically.
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
Randomize
