Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
You walked in, sat down, looked at the waiter and said, "I'm only having deserts and liquor."
You can't break up with me and ask me for a handjob on the same day. At least not in that order.
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
You got pulled on stage by a stripper who wore ruffled ankle socks and did jumping jacks for her dance. Then you were put in a chokehold by a security guard that almost cried because you supposedly said "fuck you!" to him.
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
I walked in on him fucking my best friend. I think we've reached the point of following each other on twitter.
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
when a dude sends me an unwanted dick pic I just send him a picture of a nicer one. A more photogenic one. A dick with a future.
if I dont text you back in 10min assume i am in fact still dizzy and injured myself in the shower. and call an ambulance. thanx.
Randomize
