In the future we'll all be gay
Seriously. Destroy her vagina. Do it like an angry baboon mating with a gentle manatee.
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
He said he wanted to make me his Twinkie, "filled with his delicious cream." ABSOLUTELY 100% NO YOU MAY NOT REPEAT ****NOT**** GIVE HIM MY NUMBER EVER EVER EVER. Please confirm receipt and full comprehension of this message.
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
On a scale of "huh, that's interesting" to "holy porn stars, batman". How good?
Definitely closer to "holy porn stars, batman".
Dude I pissed in her little brother's closet and when I tried to flush the doorknob her parents came out and saw me standing there naked, no more ambien for me
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
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