why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
So hungover. I'm getting too old for trolloping around in disco shorts going shot for shot with well behaved underclassmen in an effort to lure them to the dark side of alcoholism and liver failure.
Nothing is working I'm going to die alone and on hold with a State Farm representative
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
