I'm going to use my one free fuck up card tonight.
What'd you do?
Its more like what im about to do.
You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
the guy i hooked up with is asleep on our couch. please dont fuck him.
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
No, no, no. Fuck you. I took a glass blowing class solely to learn how to make that bong. You shattered it and my dreams in a matter of five seconds.
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
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