i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
somebody snuck up and got me drunk
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
Pretty sure I just heard the turkey yell "don't put me in there" as it was going in the oven. way too high for this holiday.
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
Im pretty sure my housekeeper high fived her on the way out this morning
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
im on a boat
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