you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
I just saw her shopping list. The only things on it are blackberries, hot fudge and condoms. I almost don't wanna know. Almost.
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
There are apples in the microwave and a cup of twigs in the fridge. I think she's hiding in the pantry, I can hear her giggling. Leaving her to it.
Wearing a french maid costume for Halloween sure did help me meet girls
Dude, they all thought you were gay.
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
Randomize