It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.
You said you'd make me a thank you card for taking care of your drunk ass. I'll be expecting that monday.
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
I’m 95% positive I adopted a bunny last night.
You had cocktails, didn’t you?
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