On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
I can't be the first person ever who had to explain why her bottle of orange juice had a picture of a screwdriver drawn on it
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
... Cuz there's nothing like having your two male roommates catching you have a good cry in the driveway at 9am on a Wednesday.
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
Just read the 12 signs you're a horrible roommate post and fucking in your roommate's bed wasn't on the list, so I'm a pretty awesome roommate.
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
Randomize
