Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
Like reprimanding the wall for "sneaking up on me" drunk
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
Hahahahahha. You saved a homeless man. You're actually the mother Teresa of skanks.
So hungover that I might just sit in my car and wait until chipotle opens...in two hours...
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
Randomize
