FYI..good luck when you get back from work.. mom and dad know about the boy you brought home last night
haha good one..how did you even know?
we all know. he obviously didn't leave when you might have told him to.. he came down when we were eating because he coud smell mom's cooking. the dude ate with us and offered to say grace. so yeah, good luck.
Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
His birthday is on fathers day. I know its a cruel coincedence but this is too funny to pass up.
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
I should have known when she said it would be "fun" we'd end up in the hospital
Soo I'm in the trunk of a car drunk about to jump on trampolines. My life rocks!
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
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