i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
Nothing screams don't date me louder then having your baby as your profile pic
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
It's either gonna be a cock in my mouth or a burger. You decide which.
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
Side note. I love it when I think I've sobered up and then I get a second wind of drunk
Sometimes the gods of alcohol choose to take you on a mysterious journey and you just have to go with it
And on the first day of my adult job, I matched with one of my co workers on tinder...
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
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