Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
I was paranoid that someone would jizz in my hair while I had the cucumbers over my eyes. Super-High Spa Day didnt work out.
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
HOLY FUCK i just remembered we had bows and arrows and firecrackers last night
and flaming arrows and vodka
how did we not set your garage on fire
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
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