physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
So I'm at the Chevron by your house. I need a condom and a couch.
Together?
Preferably.
Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
I hate when you've made an ugly girl's day by having sex with her, and then she gets greedy and wants to cuddle after you cum.
when I woke up she was standing in the living room with a bottle of scotch because she is "allergic to hangovers"
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
No, I'm in the bathroom trying to scrub off the 16 tally marks on my wrist so its not so obviously to the world that I puked on a couch last night.
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
I walked in on him pumping himself up by headbanging to the drumbeat from Jumanji.
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
As your friend, I promise I will drink a full bottle of vodka and belly slide down the stairs with you if that test is positive
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
Randomize
