It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
I'll pay for our taxi if you let me makeout with the drummer and we don't leave RIGHT when the bassist does.
we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
What's up with the fire hydrant in the laundry room?
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
Sometimes having a penis is like having a really stupid drunk best friend. You see it doing dumb shit but you're just not the one in charge.
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
Help. Why am I so naked?
Randomize
