Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
no today was horrible, i woke up and somebody slit my car tire and left an apology letter in my wiper that said "sorry wrong house"
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
You know, be my cock's hype man.
I feel like that needs to be the last time i end a text with "fuck them i love tequila".
Fair warning, if I start singing "Kiss Me, I'm Shitfaced" at any point tomorrow, just go with it
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
I told my coworker that I'd get him some edibles because he wants to rekindle his marriage. I'd better get some good karma out of this.
Nope. Im a prince of the americas. I treat my women like future queens. Also, im drunk watching the royal wedding
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
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