remember when u banged some random dude twice in the back restaurant room of the bar i work at with customers still there? and woke up with an enormous highschool-sized hickey this morning? no big deal.
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
Who is John, and why is his named carved into our toilet?
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
Needless to say, I woke up on the bathroom floor wearing the dress that my mom wore to the wedding. That open bar stole my soul.
I really need to curb my attractions to blondes with tattoo sleeves, firearms and alcoholism
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
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