I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
I'd just like to say before I start drinking tonight that not only do I not find you attractive; I don't want to hook up with you, suck your dick, be your "suga mama" or have your babies. Please disregard any texts, phone calls or voicemails that say otherwise..
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
How is it possible that I'm still a virgin and you've managed to have sex in a cheetah print onesie TWICE
And let me tell you, getting your ass waxed is the weirdest fucking experience.
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
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