a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
We're going to work out tomorrow I guess but it usually consists of doing weights for 10 minutes, then saying fuck cardio and going to Taco Tuesday
Hey. My eyes swollen shut and I can't find my shoes. How was your night?
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
My pants zipper is stuck halfway down. I have to interview an intern later. This day is gonna be amazing,
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
It's only 10am and I doubt my day could get much worse. During my 9am meeting I had to sit between my boss who I fucked for my promotion and the guy he walked in on me fucking on the copier
Uhmmmm is there really any way to tactfully ask "you into me jerking you off with my feet... or nah" cause if you find one let me know 😂
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