OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
I forgot if I was chewing my gum or my tongue
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
My hangover didn't kick in until like 4pm so I found myself puking in the middle of Times Square. During rush hour. In a three piece suit. A spongebob came by and patted me on the back.
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
On the plus side, he ate me out and gave me an orgasm. But he also talked about robots during sex and mispronounced it like the dad in the goldbergs and called them “robits”
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