I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
Is it weird to say that getting an std with you was kinda romantic?
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
I wanted lighthearted conversation about ordering bulk condoms and anal lube but he's depressed and talking about god hating him, ugh
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
Nothing says "Happy New Year" like having to shit into a plastic bag.
Randomize
