Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
just ran into a kid I used to hook up with while wearing his shirt. Only me. I tried to pretend like it wasn't his but it said his name on the back so I wasn't winning that.
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
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