You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
Is that you who's passed out on my treadmill?
My bed smells like stale sex...I want it to smell like fresh sex, I miss you.
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
I walked into your room and you had fallen asleep smoking a cigarette. You just had the butt in your mouth with ash all over your face.
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
I always feel bad for the sober driver... Never been me but I feel bad... empathetic AF
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
Randomize
