When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
I just discovered how perfect a shot glass is for putting your chicken nugget dipping sauces into. Like I'll probably do this when I'm a mother feeding my children.
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
my coworker just texted me asking if i remember pissing in the mop bucket at the gas station
How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
Pretty sure I just shit out pure stomach acid. I'll explain after you take me to a hospital
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
Never let him bartend when he's tripping. He sprinkled a ton of mexican shredded cheese over a jack and coke and called in a Monterey Jack Daniels.
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
He offered me handsanitizer after a hand job, you can't tell me he's not perfect!
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
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