garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
Just got a citation from campus security for an "accordion disturbance."
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
I'm pretty sure the bus driver knew how hung over I was and hit all the pot holes on purpose. I threw up into my water bottle.
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a taco... I feel like a female Elvis.
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
maybe you met your husband and you just don't know it yet
and other hilarious jokes you can tell yourself
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