girl has like over 50 stars tattooed on her front, side and back. feels like i just fucked the universe.
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
captain&coke to the library. STAT. this is an emergency. this is not a drill. I repeat: THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
Let's be real. I'm the Usain Bolt of running away after hookups. Fastest (wo)man alive.
I left after he drunkenly went into the kitchen and started to make eggs with a shitload of garlic. First time I'd ever had a makeout session interrupted by eggs.
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
Randomize
