Someone shit on the floor
I'm going to rape someone's good day.
I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
I'm sitting on the patient chair, waiting for my vagina to be violated & "i don't want to miss a thing" has been playing on repeat. WHY IS THIS HAPPENING TO ME.
There is a pube in my fucking eyeball
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
I'm eating a subway sandwich in the bathtub because I don't want to move. God bless boys from Brooklyn
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
Randomize
